Yesterday I stalked my first celebrity and I thought I would share a few tips with you… since I am now a pro and all.
You see, in Oklahoma, celebrities don’t exactly run rampid. Your choices are basically Toby Keith, or some random football legend. So guess who I saw… TOBY KEITH. Expect Toby doesn’t really deserve all caps because he actually annoys the crap out of me. I am not really a fan, but I do appreciate him throwing his wealth back into Oklahoma. Thank you, Toby, now quit wearing your stupid cowboy hat over a bandanna.
Before I share my tips, let me first tell you how I happened upon Toby. My friend called me. Yep, I was minding my own business, enjoying my evening and I dropped everything to go stalk Toby. Aren’t you glad you know someone as awesome as me? Actually, I was on my way home from the grocery store and Toby’s location just happened to be on my way home, so I made a slight detour and drove by. Actually, B drove by. I giggled obnoxiously in the passenger seat. So awesome.
There are a few important things to know when stalking a celebrity. First, don’t giggle obnoxiously the entire time. Second, remember your camera! I am not sure US Weekly cares about Toby Keith, but at least it would have made this blog post more interesting.
Toby picture not stalked by me.
Another thing to keep in mind when stalking celebrities, don’t freak out when you think Toby has spotted you. I am pretty sure it made me look more obvious. And my last tip, don’t repeatedly circle the parking lot trying to get a better look.
Are you embarrassed by me yet? Don’t worry, I kind of am myself. I have never seen a celebrity in their “natural” habitat. I might have over reacted, a little. Remind me not to move to Hollywood in this lifetime.
Brian worked on a movie set in college (I won’t reveal the movie due to it’s horrendousness) and Tommy Lee Jones was in it. One day TLJ (as he was referred to on set) showed up to film a scene and he called Brian “sport” and then asked him to watch his cigar. Needless to say, Brian did not feel very star-struck in that moment. But that encounter helps him to remember that celebrities are like the rest of us except most of them are assholes.
No, no, no… not Toby… anyone but Toby… if you ever stalk him again you better kick him. When I met Jenna Fischer I yelled “JENNA!” so loud I scared the piss out of her…. but that’s ok because I got a good pic with her… go me.
Where were you stalking him at?
I am a celebrity junkie, but in my older age have gotten too lazy to be too excited. I have seen and or spoken to several. Most were nice, some were not.
James Belushi (total ass)-met him at Planet Hollywood in Chicago
Susan E. Hinton (Susie)-author of the Outsiders and many other great books (I interviewed her once. She is from Tulsa.)
BARRY SWITZER-I interviewed him. He totally hit on me when I was 17. I was hot, then. And skinny. The good ol’ days.
Vince Gill (sweet, adorable hunk)-Interviewed him when he was in Guthrie for a Bluegrass Festival.
Joshua Morrow (he plays Nick Newman in the Young and the Restless)-Interviewed him when he was in town for a Home and Garden Show years ago. (Dear Lord! He is soooo hot and he was a sweetheart.) It turned into a two-day interview. You know with all the sex and stuff.
Tom Cruise and Dustin Hoffman-Saw them from a distance when they filmed Rain Man in Guthrie.
Neil Patrick Harris-He drove by when I was visiting my cousins in Albuquerque. He went to highschool there.
The guy that played Donatello in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie-He lived across the street from my cousins in Albuquerque.
Cary Blanchard-NFL kicker for the Colts years ago
Kendall Cross-Olympic Wrestling Gold Medalist
Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood-Met them when they dined at the restaurant I was waiting tables at. (Super nice.)
Steve Nuno-Shannon Miller’s coach
Most recently (2007), I met Blake Shelton. He is hot, hot, hot and was also very nice.
You are seriously hilarious!! *lol*
How funny! celeb stalkerazzi.
How funny! Where was he/what was he doing??
Bahaha! I once has breakfast next tp Steven Spleilberg at a Starbucks in San Fran. I didn’t even know it was him until I asked him to move his chair on the way out!